ooohh life.

So it wasn't until my sophomore year of college that I decided what I wanted to be when I eventually grow up, but my advisors at UT said it would add two more years onto my undergrad, thus grad school. But what I don't understand is my family's lack of support in my dream? anyone got a answer?

My grandparents are constantly telling me sports and working in hockey isn't what I want to do. The worst is my dad's mom, she constantly is putting me down and telling me "You don't want to work and live in New York or Pittsburgh or Denver." really? when did you decide this isn't what I want to do? When do you have a say in my life?

I honestly believe that if God wanted me to become a teacher and stay here in Dallas He wouldn't have got me into graduate school. He would have provided me with a teaching job. He wouldn't have given me this passion for hockey and the passion to move up north.

I know that the past 8 months have been extremely hard, I mean who expects to graduate from THE University of Texas, apply for 250 jobs and not get one? But I believe that all this struggle is apart of God's greater plan for me. He wouldn't have provided this academic opportunity in the field that I believe I am suppose to go into. Yes, now I am facing another struggle, finding an internship, but I know it will come and it will be unbelievable.

I have set the Lord always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. (Psalm 16:8)

ahhhh grad school

So I officially started school on Tuesday, but it was a online class. Last night was my first actual grad class, and I must say I was a little disappointed. It was Stats, but I was the youngest person in the class by like 10 years. Seriously. I am the ONLY one in that class not married.

Looking back today several of my classmates made me super mad, and I know I shouldn't hold on to it, so I will let it go tomorrow. Some of us were in class 20 mins before it started and were chatting about life and such when someone asked me where I did my undergrad. Well since I LOVE my school I had no problem offering over info about my time there. Then the next question was what am I getting my Master's in, which of course is Sport Management. I always get weird looks when I say this because I am a blonde headed, blue eyed, 22 year old girl, last night was no exception. Well we all started talking sports (my favorite topic) and every time I said something I got cut off by the older men & one woman (who her daughters go to a&m). EVERY TIME I tried to say something, that I know a lot about I got cut off and looked at like I am a complete idiot. I do know A LOT about sports, and A LOT about UT athletics, BECAUSE I WENT THERE. These people went to some small school that doesn't even have athletics, so why should they be all knowing of UT athletics? UGH. I am just so mad.

Just because I am a girl doesn't mean you can talk to me like I don't know anything about sports. I am aware that this is just the start because women aren't really in sports, especially hockey, but I am just in shock that people who aren't sport management students would treat me like that.

I know that there are going to be struggles throughout this whole ordeal (grad school), and I just need to give it up to God. My life is in his hands and he knows what he is doing when he planned out my life.

Psalm 23:1-4
The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.He makes me to lie down in green pastures;He leads me beside the still waters.He restores my soul;He leads me in the paths of righteousness For His name's sake.Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil;For You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.

Tim Tebow

As soon as I met one of my college friends Lindsay, I knew three things about her: she was from Crawford, Texas where President Bush lives, she loves the Lord with all of her heart, and she was in love with Tim Tebow (at the time he was The University of Florida's QB). As Lindsay and I became better friends I became certain that she was going to marry Tim. They would be absolutely perfect for one another, and she agrees, we just need to have them meet.

With all the current news that Tebow is receiving, which is mostly positive I decided to read his book. Holy Cow this guy blows me away. I don't think he should quit his day job and become a writer, but he could def quit and become a preacher. The way he talks about his faith and how it is the core of his life is amazing. The way he talks about his walk and relationship with Christ is breathtaking and has really made me reflect on my relationship with the Lord.

One particular section of the book describes on how he was absolutely torn as to where to attend college, it was either Florida or Alabama. He says that he honestly had no idea where to go as he had developed a great relationship with both coaches and he literally chose seconds before he was to make the announcement on ESPN. Tim said that he cried because he was so torn between the two schools.

As I do not know this particular feeling as I didn't have schools fighting over me, I do know the feeling of not knowing my future. After graduating from UT, I thought getting a job would be no problem. Well God had a different plan because I didn't get any of the non-profit jobs I applied for, then I got certified to teach and still didn't get a job. I literally thought I had a teaching job in the bag and was all set to go sign my contract when I got word that they went with someone else. Talk about being rock bottom. That night I went to dinner with my parents and one of my old friends Kristen was there with her husband and she came over and chatted. Well with the stress of the day I just lost it and cried while she listened and consoled me. She suggested that I just look into going to graduate school at DBU. Sold. That night I went home and looked into it. One thing lead to another and now I start in one week.

"I know the plans that I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and hope." Jeremiah 29:11

Tim talks about this particular verse and how it gave him peace in his decision. I do believe that it now gives me peace too. I have this pretty massive internship that I have to do this coming summer and I know I want it to be HUGE, like work for a big team. I have my dream team and I am hopeful that I will have an opportunity with them, but I did receive a call from another team (their rival) and about wet myself. I know I want to work for my dream team soooo very bad, but God clearly has another plan and has placed this other team in my sights. So I am giving it all up to Him. God is in control and whatever happens will happen.

Friends

I was fortunate enough to make my best friend on the first day of college. We had a 3 hour class together on the first day of our college careers and instantly hit it off. It helped that we lived in the same dorm, had the same values, and had the same major. Soon after our friendship began we made another friend and were instantly inseperable. Literally. If you saw one of us you saw all of us. We ate together. We went to the grocery store together. We went to church together. We would walk to class together. These girls are my rock. I love them to pieces and its def true that I went to college to find my bridesmaids, and these two are them:)

 

Tiffany and I, senior year at a basketball game cheering on Matt!! 

 Chelsea, Tiffany and Me at the Fine Arts graduation in May!!

Since moving back home I have realized that I don't have friends up here in Dallas. I left most of them in Austin, one of them moved to South Carolina for Law School, another one moved back home to Houston, and another is in Atlanta starting a new job! The hardest thing about graduating college is that I left all these great people. I text these girls (and one guy) all the time, but they aren't just a text away to go grab coffee, or come over and watch Grey's Anatomy. Its def been an adjustment and a hard one.

Back row: Jennifer, Lindsay, Kate, Vicki, Tiffany, Lindsay

Front row: Shelby, Jackie, Alys, Me, Chelsea, and Alisha.

I am hoping that with the start of graduate school in a week will bring more friends. I am in a male dominated program, literally I am the only girl, but it never hurts to have guy friends. I am not setting my standards high that I will make another best friend for life, but it'd be nice to grab dinner with someone other than my parents:)

2012 here we go!

This is going to be a big year, I know it. I start graduate school in about a week and I am so freaking excited! I think I am more excited about my Master's than I was about my Bachelor's, don't get me wrong I absolutely adore UT and the glorious 4 years I spent there but I wasn't the biggest fan of my major. English wasn't what I wanted, I realized this too late thus grad school here I come.

I have to do this internship as it is required for my curriculum and I am soo excited. I could potentially stay here in Dallas and work for the Cowboys/Rangers/Stars/Mavs, but I kinda want to get away. I want to live somewhere different and experience a different city. Denver has been the topic of discussion lately, but I have applied in Nashville, Charlotte, New York City, and Memphis too and there are tons of teams that haven't put up their summer internships yet so I guess we'll see. I am a firm believer that I will go where God sees me fit. As much as I would absolutely LOVE to work for the Pittsburgh Penguins I will go wherever He leads me.  But with that being said I'm pretty sure Hockey is the sport for me:)

This year is bound to be awesome. I am hoping for some unbelievable experiences and some valuable learning experiences too.